Finally Have a Push to Take Care of Myself

I’d like to say that I’ve always taken care of myself, went to the doctor when I needed to, exercise regularly, and eat well. But I can’t, and really, I don’t know anyone who can. I’m not thin by any means, I’m considered over weight to assholes and professionals alike, but that doesn’t change anything. I am who I am. And telling me that I’m over weight isn’t going to fix anything, trust me, if it were that easy no one would be over weight.

Now that I know that I will soon have a growing life inside of me, that I will have a living human inside of my body, feeding off of me and knowing that anything I put in or on my body goes straight to the baby, all I want to do is eat healthy (not diet, eff that, this girl doesn’t like to be hungry) and moderately exercise. I chug water like I’m dehydrated, and I don’t even think there is urine in my urine, haha. All I think about when I eat is that I need to get healthy for our future baby. Plus there are things that I am trying to give up now that I will need to give up when the time comes. I don’t really like soda or sugary drinks, so that’s not a big deal. But I do love my coffee, and I love to drink and get drunk. My husband and I just quit smoking a couple months ago, not for baby plans, it was just time, but we still enjoy hookah every weekend, and any kind of smoke is not good for your baby, so there’s just a few things right there.

I plan healthy meals, I make sure i eat breakfast, nothing big, fruit and maybe some eggs or half a bagel. I have lunch, which could range from Top Roman to salad, but generally healthy. I have a light snack, a granola bar, or some nuts. Then dinner, and something sweet. Nothing big, nothing too unhealthy. I mean not that Top Roman is super healthy, but it’s better than fast food or something of the like. I hardly drink soda or Kool-Aid, I drink water all day from a huge mason jar, and then with dinner I’ll have juice or soda. I feel better about it, I still avoid the scale like the plague, but I don’t need numbers, I can feel the difference.

I would like to go to the doctor in August so that I can make sure that my body is healthy enough to have a baby, and I want to make sure that I am up to date with vaccines, and such. I’m so ready to prepare for a baby, I want to be as healthy as I can when I’m pregnant. I know that that is easier said than done, especially with cravings and things, and I truly won’t know till I get there, but for now I will hope and prepare, and I am a strong person, and I believe that if I push, and keep future Baby H in mind, I can sure as hell try. That’s all for now. I feel so crazy that we aren’t even going to be trying to conceive until September, even though I will be a FTM, I feel like I’m over planning, and that I sound like I’m talking out of my ass. Please, please, please tell me otherwise! I surely need it! I feel nuts and I’m not even close to pregnant yet.

Until next time,